Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Metamusical Inquiry Breakthrough Shock
Dr. Hardwick Herpes, legendary semiologicohermeneutician and metamusicologist, has revealed a theoretical breakthrough that threatens to stand the metamusical world on its head -- or perhaps he would prefer to say that it will put metamusicology back on its feet.
Dr. Herpes, who posts on this blog but has forgotten his password, spoke exclusively to Global HQ Freelton about his exciting new breakthrough.
"What we call metamusic in the semiologicohermeneutical field," he told us in the library of his rambling two-bedroom postwar bungalow in Birchmount Park, Toronto, "has always been dedicated to the elimination of non-musical standards that have been imposed on music. The field of metamusic has been muddied recently by the co-optation of the name metamusic by purveyors of CDs they claim stimulate the brain. After long consideration based on the assumption that these new metamusicians were mere conceptual bandits, I suddenly realized that they might actually have had an insight that we professional semiologicohermeneuticians could develop into a major conceptual breakthrough.
"And finally I broke through, by the simple expedient of focussing on the original meaning of the word metamusic. The word literally means 'after music,' when in fact the oeuvre of the Anachronisms, the world's greatest and definitive metamusicians, has been devoted to stripping modern 'music' of affectation and unnecessary elaboration.
"In other words, what the contemporary world calls music is in fact a corruption of music. It is literally metamusic, since it what you get after music has been corrupted. What the Anachronisms produce is music, the original outpouring of creative minds uncorrupted by later application of unnecessary technical performance standards or harmonic 'theory'."
Dr. Herpes had to leave at this point for an aromatherapy session, but consultation by Global HQ Freelton with members of the group revealed that his stunning breakthrough may have an immediate influence on the Anachro-oeuvre. Guest artist Red Slapp, for example, was so impressed that he promised to develop what he described as an ur-musical version of "Tenderly" that he hopes to record as part of the group's latest project.
Other important semiologicohermeneuticians, such as Oxford don Dr. Putyourshirtonbackwards and freelance scholar Don Zither, have yet to comment. Dr. Herpes' new theoretical position may end up exploding semilogicohermeneutical metamusicological theory or it may end up being a catalyst for the creation of more and greater music (sic). Whatever happens, history will record it as a defining intellectual moment of the 21st century.
Dr. Hardwick Herpes, legendary semiologicohermeneutician and metamusicologist, has revealed a theoretical breakthrough that threatens to stand the metamusical world on its head -- or perhaps he would prefer to say that it will put metamusicology back on its feet.
Dr. Herpes, who posts on this blog but has forgotten his password, spoke exclusively to Global HQ Freelton about his exciting new breakthrough.
"What we call metamusic in the semiologicohermeneutical field," he told us in the library of his rambling two-bedroom postwar bungalow in Birchmount Park, Toronto, "has always been dedicated to the elimination of non-musical standards that have been imposed on music. The field of metamusic has been muddied recently by the co-optation of the name metamusic by purveyors of CDs they claim stimulate the brain. After long consideration based on the assumption that these new metamusicians were mere conceptual bandits, I suddenly realized that they might actually have had an insight that we professional semiologicohermeneuticians could develop into a major conceptual breakthrough.
"And finally I broke through, by the simple expedient of focussing on the original meaning of the word metamusic. The word literally means 'after music,' when in fact the oeuvre of the Anachronisms, the world's greatest and definitive metamusicians, has been devoted to stripping modern 'music' of affectation and unnecessary elaboration.
"In other words, what the contemporary world calls music is in fact a corruption of music. It is literally metamusic, since it what you get after music has been corrupted. What the Anachronisms produce is music, the original outpouring of creative minds uncorrupted by later application of unnecessary technical performance standards or harmonic 'theory'."
Dr. Herpes had to leave at this point for an aromatherapy session, but consultation by Global HQ Freelton with members of the group revealed that his stunning breakthrough may have an immediate influence on the Anachro-oeuvre. Guest artist Red Slapp, for example, was so impressed that he promised to develop what he described as an ur-musical version of "Tenderly" that he hopes to record as part of the group's latest project.
Other important semiologicohermeneuticians, such as Oxford don Dr. Putyourshirtonbackwards and freelance scholar Don Zither, have yet to comment. Dr. Herpes' new theoretical position may end up exploding semilogicohermeneutical metamusicological theory or it may end up being a catalyst for the creation of more and greater music (sic). Whatever happens, history will record it as a defining intellectual moment of the 21st century.
Labels: Metamusic
