Metamusic

A quick look at the datafile used by Dr. Spart-Hoxha reveals a dozen songs involving bowel function, for only three of which were the bowels recorded as the subject. Five were coded as being about existence, two as being about food, one as about love, and one as about science.

Half the lyrics about bowels were written collectively, while only 13% of other lyrics were written collectively. The difference in percentage is statistically significant. And artistically significant as well, I should think.

George W. Bush was raised by Barbara Bush, but who was Barbara Bush raised by?

I think you're onto a major story here: the SARS-wolf linkage. What if SARS did not emerge from poultry in China? What if its origins are distinctly canine? Suppose many of the World's Top People were raised by wolves? Wouldn't it make sense to create a smokescreen to deflect any detailed investigation of the true source of SARS? I think we should be told.

Alienated manicurists are another oppressed group whose plight has been publicized by the Lads.

We here at HQ are getting really suspicious about this Nana Mouskouri thing. Every other performer is avoiding T. O., but Nana is there quicker than a rat up a drain. No fear of SARS on old Nana. Think it might have something to do with certain characteristics of her DNA?

Turning to others who were raised by wolves, there seems to have been a mixed bag in recent years in terms of "success". While the Pope seems to be doing very well - Poping along just fine - John Turner's star seems to be on the wane.
The taboo group that remains the most neglected, though, is perhaps the Disembodied (This is not my body). It would be nice to see some of the self-promoting liberal musical establishment take a stand on behalf of this downtrodden sector of society.

DANGER!

Nana Mouskouri is coming to Toronto! The Freelton Metamusic Organization has issued a travel advisory, telling its members not to visit Toronto unless absolutely necessary, and to exercise extreme caution when travelling in Toronto. The FMO stopped short of placing a bounty on Mouskouri's head.

Speak of the devil -- Nana Mouskouri was in London, Ontario this past weekend. She's on tour, opening for Harry Belafonte (that's what it said int the London Free Press, although Harry must be about 100 now). Anyway, Mr. Belafonte was sick, so instead she opened for John macDermott. They drew 1,500 to a 5,500-seat arena. She needs to be performing a bit farther north where there is a significant wolf population.